Monday, May 7, 2012

They Say Time Heals All Wounds

There is an old saying that time heals all wounds...sometimes I wonder if whomever said this realizes that they were missing another important element that should have been included in this saying...LOVE.  Time alone does not heal old wounds of the heart.  In fact, time can make it worse if that wound is allowed to fester and turns into bitterness.  It is only the combination of time and love that can help heal or at least lessen old wounds.  Anyone that has ever been hurt emotionally knows that it is the love, support and caring over time of friends and family that get you through the rough spots in life.  Some of the wounds, like the loss of a loved one, never completely go away but they do get easier to handle and over time you find yourself being able to smile more and appreciate the gift that they were to you without as many tears flowing (but yes, there are still moments of tears).  I still, 29 years after my Grandmother's death, mourn her and miss her terribly.  Her death left an empty hole in my heart for so long.  She was an amazing lady and so special to me.  We had a very close relationship and her love for me was unconditional as was mine for her.  There are still moments of tears when I think of her but there are many more moments of smiles, stories, laughter and love now.  It has been time and lots of love (hers for me, mine for her and also the love of my wonderful family and friends) and support that have gotten me to this point.

Now that I am a grandmother myself, I have been thinking about my own grandmother more and more often.  I now understand her deep love for me in a whole new way.  There is something so special about the love of a grandparent for their grandchild.  I find myself wishing all over again that my grandmother had been able to meet my husband before she died, that she had been able to hold her great grandsons Chris, Jaysn and Josh the way that my mother was able to hold her great grandson Bradley and see the next generation of the family continue on.  I still find myself "talking" to my grandmother in my heart and telling her about all that is going on in my life and how much I miss her. 

So the old saying is partially true...but to not have the wound would mean that I never had the blessing of the experience of having such a wonderful person in my life.  I'll take the wound and the love and memories for it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

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