Thursday, November 12, 2020

High Anxiety and Fibromyalgia Flares


   I'm not coping well at the moment.  My anxiety levels are really high between the whole election messiness and our country going crazy, Covid-19 and people dying from it in our area (some even that I personally know), not being able to go and see my parents and my brother Fritz this year, and not seeing my kids and grandkids often because we are all trying to be careful and any sniffle or not feeling well with anyone in our family cancels out any family get togethers.  My family is my world and not being able to see them, hold them, hug them and laugh with them just kills me inside.  Most of us are really good about wearing masks, but there are a few that are not and that could potentially put us all at risk.  Three of us are high risk due to age and health issues, and yes, we three make sure to wear our masks when out and about.


   It seems like every time I turn on the computer, I am bombarded with bad news.  I see covid cases and death rates rising, people out looting and rioting and acting like rabid animals towards their fellow man. I see them smashing and destroying properties and businesses that took people years to save up for and develop.  These rioters and looters don't care one single bit about anyone but themselves...they are opportunistic cockroaches in my opinion.  Oregon that just legalized the use of hard drugs.  If they think they have a problem now, just wait until all the drug dealers and addicts move to Oregon.  Crime is going to skyrocket!  I have family there and it scares me to death to think of what may happen to them.

   I am deeply concerned for and and scared for our country right now.  No matter who wins this election (with all the recounts going on), we are going to continue to have people protesting for a very long time.  It seems like it has become a way of life for some.  My concern is also about certain rights being taken away from us and watching our country go down a socialist path.  I don't want us to end up like Cuba or Venezuela.  I don't want that kind of a world for my kids and grandkids.  

   All of this has ramped up my anxiety and caused my fibromyalgia symptoms to flare up big time.  It is also causing my IBS to go into overtime.  Earlier I could not find fibro fog was so bad in my head.  Trying to concentrate on something is almost impossible.  I am having to correct so much while I type this out that it is not even funny. At one point I had to hold onto furniture to walk from my bed to the bathroom.  I am still really achy all over my body, even my hair follicles on my head hurt!  My skin is breaking out and I itch all over.  All this and more are part of my flare.

   I am trying, I really am, to calm down and just remember that God is still in control, no matter what.  I am spending less time online and trying to fill my time with uplifting things when I am not paralyzed by fear and anxiety.  Yes, I am on medication to help with the anxiety, but I may have to take an additional medication that I have here for times when my anxiety spins out of control and I start to slip into depression.  I absolutely hate feeling this way!  

   Our state, along with many others, is seeing a huge spike in Covid-19 cases.  There was a media information online thingy on Tuesday and basically they were preparing us all for much stricter rollbacks on things once more.  I fully expect our governor to come out and tell us that we are not allowed to gather with more that 5 people a week (that was one of their many recommendations) and to NOT get together with people outside of our immediate households for Thanksgiving unless we do it outside and wear masks the whole time.  That is impossible to do over on this side of the state with snow coming in and cold temperatures.  I have already warned Chris and Heather about this and that we may not be coming for Thanksgiving after all.  I have a feeling that the media online thing was just preparing us for this announcement and that it will happen today or tomorrow.  I so wish people would have just worn their masks and been careful so we could have avoided this.  There are way too many people who know they have covid-19 wandering around infecting others, never mind the ones who do not know they are infected and spreading it too.  Out little town has 16 cases that we know of...16 now!  I am afraid to see what the numbers will look like within the next few days.

   Jeff is getting worried too.  We have seen Biden's plan for a 4-6 week nationwide paid shutdown.  With all the trouble that the government had getting unemployment to people already, how do they propose to make sure that people have the money BEFORE the shutdown so that they can pay their bills DURING the shutdown?  Jeff and I have decided that we need to do everything we can to save as much money as possible and bank it for the time being.  We do not want to be caught short and not be able to pay our monthly bills and also want to have money set aside for the property taxes that will come due at the beginning of 2021.  The only big purchase we still have to make is another ton of wood pellets for our stove.  We have 2 put in right now, but we will need one more and with the shortages on pellets, I want to get it sooner than later to make sure that we can still get some.

   I am praying we get some kind of relief from all of this soon but I fear that things are just going to get a lot worse before they get better.  Praying that I am wrong.





  1. I feel the same way. My friend just got in a fight at an RV Park!! for having a Trump sign in his window. I was asked to leave a blog because I could not celebrate Biden. I have been quiet for a long time. NOw I feel God is telling me to speak up.

    1. I also have fibromyalgia and it is flaring as well. Do I just crawl into bed and hide hoping this all goes away? The pain is unbearable.

  2. Hold onto your faith. God will get us through this. I am so sorry you are in pain. Praying you get better.

  3. I am sorry for your anxiety and I have it also. But we will just be careful and cautious and we are both well supplied with food. We will get through this my friend.

  4. I live in Florida, where our governor has apparently decided that we will be the poster children for herd immunity. So many will unnecessarily die because of no mask mandate and everything is open, come on down! My stress is really high, too, because Republicans are trying their best to take away the ACA during a pandemic! How heartwarming.

  5. It's Friday, in Oregon. Our family has just opted out of Thanksgiving dinner with our relatives, due to the fact that we have just been put into another shut-down, like the one last spring. Our church is back to on-line, exclusively. My daughter works in a coffee shop/restaurant and it's going to take-out only starting Wednesday. Hopefully, she will be able to keep her job. She kept it last time, but with reduced hours. Our state is finally getting a surge in Covid, which is too bad. I'm hoping these measures will bring it down.

    So, we all keep praying. My mom said it well on the family text: Let's all concentrate on the good things we do have, and that we all have each other. Let's give thanks. But, I'm the first one to admit, it will be hard to not be together with our very close family on Thanksgiving, and I'll bet Christmas.

    Hang in there, everybody. This will pass.

  6. Everything that can be shaken, will be shaken. God has not given you a spirit of fear. Fear comes from Satan. He owns the media and spews his vomit through them. The only way he can touch you without God's permission (Book of Job) is by parallelizing you with fear.

    Before a farmer can plow the ground, the weeds must be ripped up. That process is destructive, painful and confusing. We are in the middle of that process. God is taking us back to the Book of Acts.

    Election night on the Hebrew (God's) calendar was the same night the rain began falling on the ark. It rained for 40 days and nights which brings us to (on our calendar) the day the electoral college meets. Rain for believers symbolizes the Holy Spirit. For non-believers, it is a flood, which is judgement. The wicked are beginning to drown, they are panicking and screaming through the airwaves.

    God does nothing without first revealing his plans to the prophets. He is talking through them on Youtube (which is censoring, deleting and hiding). Ask for guidance and then begin searching.


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