Some Days It Just Does Not Happen

   Today I checked my email, for the first time in about 4 days.  I know I should check it more often, but sometimes, I just can't even deal with reading it.  Believe it or not, it takes lots of energy and concentration for me to do so and there are days when that just is not happening.  I feel bad when I miss something important from someone, but most of the people that I correspond with via email understand that it may be days before I actually see their emails and respond.  I am so thankful for those that do understand.  For my own sanity, I have had to let go of the guilt of not checking it daily.

   Let's face it all, I am NOT normal.  😉  I know there are those of you who will say "Well we have known that for years" and get a good laugh out of it.  I'm good with that! 😁  Let's clarify this a bit further, I am not normal for many reasons, one of them being my health challenges.

   On those days when I am having to play charades with my hubby because I cannot think of the word that I need to say (his new favorite was when I tried to do a charade of the clothes dryer) , it would be a real stretch to think I could actually read and write something coherent out without it taking forever.  If I am having a really bad day, I will just stare blankly, mid sentence and either forget what I was saying altogether or desperately look at my husband with pleading eyes, praying that he can finish my sentence for me.  CFS and Fibro Fog are real and are so frustrating.

   These past few days have been ones where I dissolved into tears because I was frustrated with my limitations yet again.  CFS and Fibromyalgia affect every area of my life.   My sleep has been off, I cannot lift anything heavy, including full laundry baskets, it hurts to try and make up the guest bed and I had another 5 pound bag of onions that needed to be chopped and then dehydrated or frozen.  Nothing was getting done or happening.  Enter my amazing hubby who put everything he had planned to do aside and went down my list and did it all for me.  While he was doing all that, I was able to get a few less taxing things done like make up another batch of dry laundry detergent, harvest, cut up and freeze the green onions from our garden and do some cooking and baking.  Cooking and baking honestly are some of the things that I really enjoy doing.  Knowing that I was struggling though, I made large quantities of French Onion soup, Sloppy Joe meat and two huge loaves of French bread so that we would have leftovers and that would leave me free not to cook on other nights.  Those leftovers sure came in handy tonight when I had to have something quick and easy to feed my hubby and myself before he headed out to bowling league. 

   I am so thankful to my hubby for stepping in and helping me when he is able to.  Other times, when he is at work, things just don't get done on bad days.  I would say that 3/4th of my time this week has been spent curled up in my recliner with my soft fleece throw over me and at least one cat in my lap.  This is my life now and it make the good days oh so much sweeter.  With that being said, I need to get Jeff's laundry in the dryer and then go and heat up the hot tub so I can use it tonight.  Just doing his laundry has made my neck, shoulders and back ache.  I am hoping to ease those sore muscles so that I actually get some good sleep tonight.