Dealing with a lot Right Now

 

   I know that I have been pretty quiet on the blog this week.  I have tried to reply to previous posts here on my blog and I have read a few posts from some of my favorite bloggers, but am woefully behind on that also.  It's been one of those weeks when I have been absolutely floored by the horrid behavior of some people in our country with their rioting, hate speech and utter disrespect for a fallen hero who lost his life trying to make the world a safer place.  People that I have loved and respected for years are turning into very bitter and nasty beings that I no longer recognize.  We also have dear friends who have lost loved ones and/or are going through heartbreaking situations at the moment and it has been all I can do to just be there for them.  It's been a rough week.

    My stress levels went through the roof on Monday after a rather hurtful conversation with someone that I consider family.  It's sad when someone attacks someone that has been there for them for years when all I did was express sorrow, hurt and compassion for those (myself included) that had lost friends and loved ones in a horrible accident that keeps being replayed year after year on TV and the rest of the media as well.  Her response was that we need to remember and honor them and that people under the age of 31 needed to "see it for themselves".  I agree that we need to honor these people but none of us needs to see their painful and tragic deaths played out again and again.  That is not honoring them, that is exploiting them for ratings.  She then went on a tirade against me. I had to unfollow this person, whom I love, on facebook because I just can't deal with the negativity and the lack of compassion shown for others.  This is not the first time she has done something like this and I just can't deal with her right now.  I am hoping that this will help lower my stress levels again.

   One of my friends has been dealing with the whole process of watching her father slip away and finally go to heaven this week.  Another friend lost her father-in-law this week. My heart aches for them.  Other friends have gotten horrible news on the health of their loved ones.  And another friend is dealing with the ultimate betrayal that a woman can experience.  I have tried to be there for all of them.  I am a person that takes others pain and worry onto myself.  I have always been that way and it is something that as painful as it is, I do not want to change about myself because it is part of what makes me "me".  

   On a more positive note though, I was greatly relieved and so thankful for God's hand in protecting my son Josh.  Josh has been transferred to another flight line on the air base that he works on and is trying out for an elite team.  One of his higher ups did not realize that he had been transferred and just told him today when he found out that he had just put him on the list to deploy again with some of his last team but since he transferred and might become a member of the elite team, he would have to take him off that list now and Josh will not be deploying.  Josh asked where he would have been deployed to and the guy got really quiet and then said he could not tell him.  That is military speak for dangerous hostile zone.  Josh's guess is Afghanistan.  Josh has served 2 deployments in the Middle East already and I don't want him deployed there ever again, especially now!  One of my friends lost her son, who I also knew, in Afghanistan during some heavy fighting where he died saving the lives of the rest of his platoon.  Jake is one of many fallen heroes that deserve our honor and respect and his family and friends will forever miss him.  I am thankful that for now at least, my son will not be going to that same part of the world facing hostile forces.  I don't know if I would ever recover if something happened to any of my children or grandchildren.