|My MIL's favorite flower.|
A dear friend lost her mother in law about 2 weeks ago. I knew that her mother in law had been having health struggles for the last few years and that they had recently gotten worse. Her memory had been stolen from her by such a cruel disease and her care become more and more intense. Her mother in law passed away having had the chance to see her children together again and being able to have them hold her hand, kiss her cheek, and hear them tell her that they loved her. I am so thankful that they had that special time...it was a wonderful gift.
As I looked at the pictures my friend shared of her husband and his sister together with their mother, I thought about what a comfort it must have been to all of them to be able to share just being together and being there for one another. In those last precious days, my friend's husband and his sister had the privilege of being able to be there for their dying mother.
With the situation with my husband's family having gotten so much worse, I am afraid that my husband will not have the privilege of being there for his parents when it is their time to go home to God. His parents will not be able to gaze upon all of their children together in one room, something that my mother in law wants more than anything. As my husband's parents health declines, he has been totally shut out due to no fault of his own. In some ways it feels like a "death" already. He is hurting deeply and is mourning the loss of the relationship with his parents in particular. After what his siblings have put him through, he no longer even wants a relationship with them...there is no coming back from the devastation they have caused.
My parents came for a visit over the weekend. They love and adore my husband, and he them. They have always stood by him, appreciated him for the wonderful man that he is, made sure that he knows just how much he means to them and how very loved and cherished he is. As my parents left to head home, my husband thanked them for their love, support and for always being there for him. My mother hugged him tight and told him that they love him and they always will. I am so grateful for that and for the unconditional love they share. He takes great comfort in knowing that he is part of the family and has been since day one. But his heart still aches because while my side of the family envelopes him in love, part of his rejects him and that is just so hurtful to a man who has always been there for all of those who have turned their backs and shut him out him.
May anyone reading this heed this lesson...hug your parents extra tight and spend time with them if they are still with you if it is at all possible. Try to put differences aside and just be there for them. Cherish those moments and store them up in your heart and memory. All too soon you may not have the privilege of being able to do so again.