A very wise young woman, who I am blessed to be related to, posted on Facebook today that she hates bullying and has no respect for bullies. Well Meg, I am with you on this girl! Meg is a wonderful teen with a good head on her shoulders. I wish I could tell Meg that once she is out of the teen years, that she will not have to deal with any stupid bullies ever again, but the sad truth is that bullies come in all shapes, sizes and ages.
We all know that size and shape does not matter when you are a bully. You can be 4'11, skinny as a rail and still be a huge bully! Being a bully does not just mean physically pushing someone around, it can also, and more frequently is, saying or doing something hurtful to someone and trying to make them feel bad. It can be directly to their face or it can be sneaky, like spreading lies and rumors about someone.
One would think that as people grow up and reach adulthood, that they would become mature and caring people. Again, sadly, this is not always the case. There are adults in this world, of all ages, who still go out of their way to hurt others. They tell children that they are stupid, they tell teens they will never amount to anything, they call their daughters and sons horrible names. They will berate someone for making an honest mistake. These people will lie about and blame others for things they have done. They will spread rumors in the workplace trying to discredit a co-worker. They will turn on their "friends" and have the pack mentality. They enjoy gossip and want to see people fail.
Why do they do this? It has been my experience that bullies are very insecure people who are unhappy with themselves and their lives. They are terrified of anyone who can see them for who they really are so they lash out trying to make themselves feel "bigger" and superior to others. They love the attention that their bullying brings and for a few minutes they feel like they are on the top of the world but that feeling quickly fades as they realize that deep down inside, there is a big empty hole in their gut, an anger they can't explain and the terror of someone seeing just how scared they really are. Bullies are mean and we have every right to get angry with them, but we also should pity them. They lead a miserable existence and have to face themselves in the mirror every day knowing the ugly truth about who they really are.